So, it’s Valentine’s Day, and you’re single. Don’t worry. I was alone on Feb. 14 for 19 years. Until my sophomore year of college, no guy had ever asked me out on a date, I had never had a boyfriend; boys didn’t even ask to “hang out” with me in high school. And I was okay with that; I spent my Valentine’s Days with my girlfriends, a celebration now referred to as Galentine’s Day (thanks Leslie Knope).
Don’t be ashamed of your singleness this Valentine’s Day – embrace it. You can eat garlic and onion and not worry about whether or not your breath smells when he goes in for a kiss. You can lounge around in sweats, dirty hair and no makeup and no one will judge you. You can buy those heart-shaped boxes filled with chocolates, and you don’t have to share it with anyone, unless your equally single roommate is your date for the night.
Guys, go out with your friends, get some wings, play some games, watch a game or ask that girl out that you’ve been crushing on. It’s Valentine’s Day after all.
But don’t be ashamed of your singleness. Don’t feel like you have to have a significant other for life to be complete.
Probably the most important thing I learned in my years of being single was to just enjoy it. There is so much freedom and independence in your single years that you don’t realize until you’re in a relationship. And while being in a relationship is wonderful, you have another person to consider. I waited years through middle school and high school for a guy to notice me and ask me out. All my friends had boyfriends, broke up, had more boyfriends, and then broke up with them, too.
I’m actually so thankful that I didn’t date in high school; it saved me from the trouble and heartbreak that I saw so many of my friends go through. Seriously, one of my best friends dated this guy for three years of high school and was sure he was “the one.” They planned on buying promise rings and everything, and a year after graduation, they broke up. She was devastated.
Whether you’re in a relationship or not, don’t find your worth and your purpose in your significant other or in the presence or lack of a relationship. I learned to accept myself and to be happy with the life I was living. I stopped hoping that guys would ask me out and instead focused on being happy, making friends and living in the moment. Once I did that, I was asked out by the same man who will become my husband in less than a year.
So whether you’re in between relationships, or you’ve never been in one to begin with, don’t think of this Valentine’s Day as a reminder that you’re “forever alone” or wallow in self-pity that you’re spending it in your room binge watching Netflix and stuffing your face with chocolate. Ask your other single friends to go get dinner and have a good time. Celebrate you and your friends. One day you’ll celebrate with your boyfriend/girlfriend, fiancé, husband/wife, but enjoy you while you’re single.
Happy Valentine’s Day!